Saturday, May 30, 2015

Wish list

In a recent online debate about crime, a poster stated that I should support "reasonable gun control" to eliminate crime. I asked what he considered "reasonable" and this is the list he came up with:

- No automatic or semi-automatic weapons (i.e. only manually operated actions allowed – e.g. break, block, bolt, pump or lever action)
- No external magazines or clips (these are too easily re-loaded)
- No speed strips or loaders
- No ammunition capacity greater than five rounds (give the poor deer a chance)
- No expanding (e.g. hollow-tip or soft point) or +P ammunition (hollow-tips are banned by the Geneva Convention)
- No steel core or tipped ammunition (can penetrate Law Enforcement vests)
- No lead bullets or shot (too harmful to the environment)
- No bimetallic jacketed or tracer bullets (can cause forest fires)
- No bayonet lugs
- No handgun capable of muzzle energy greater than 250 ft-lbs
- No long gun capable of muzzle energy greater than 850 ft-lbs
- No handgun with a barrel shorter than 5 inches
- No plastic or “polymer” framed firearms (can defeat metal detectors)
- No rifle or shotgun with a barrel shorter than 20 inches
- No rifle or shotgun with a pistol style grip or retractable/folding stock
- No silencers, flash suppressors, muzzle breaks, compensators or threaded barrels
- No laser or night sights
- No pistol "stabilizing braces"
- All firearms must be stored and transported unloaded
- 100% registration of all firearms (with serial number & ballistic print on file)
- A 10 business day waiting period on all firearm sales
- No concealed or open carry
- Background checks and fees for all ammunition sales or transfers
- No sales of firearms or ammunition through the mail
- No sale or possession of more than 100 rounds of a particular cartridge type
- Gun locks required for firearm transport and in homes with minors under the age of 21
- Limit gun purchases to 1 per month / 2 per year / 4 maximum
- A 80% sales tariff on all gun and ammunition sales
- No private assembly of ammunition or reloading of spent cases
- All gun owners required to perform inventory inspections every 10 days and report all missing firearms
- All gun owners required to purchase mandatory liability insurance
- Federal annual permit required for all gun ownership... includes safety training, fingerprinting, photo, drug testing and mental health evaluation

Don't let anyone tell you that they don't want your guns...

4 comments:

  1. How about relatively mild noise DB upper limits, and an absolute prohibition on noise suppressors?

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  2. How about relatively mild noise DB upper limits, and an absolute prohibition on noise suppressors?

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  3. So you admit that the goal here is to write restrictions and controls that would outlaw guns, but have nothing to do with safety?

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  4. Holy shit! I'm not much of a gun person, but holy shit!

    Let's see...

    - I could probably live with this if it turned us into a society of lever-action-wielding badasses. I'd extend this to include revolvers and call it even.

    - If we did accept the above then this would largely be a given

    - This on the other hand can go fuck itself

    - This can also go fuck itself as expanding ammunition is safer for things other than the target

    - Tough shit. Make better vests for law enforcement. It's not like the bad guys aren't wearing vests too

    - Steel ball-bearings it is then! No, really. Lead from stray shot is the least of our environment's concerns

    - Possibly, someone who knows more about bimetallic jacketed ammo would need to weigh in; I get the feeling that the first has less to do with the second than implied

    - On the condition that all men, women, and children of sufficient age to bear arms must carry a sword

    - Numbers and things. Pass

    - More numbers. Pass.

    - Nope

    - With the advances in 3D printing, this will quickly become unenforceable. A few years ago I might have let them have this.

    - Nope

    - Nope (also, WHY?)

    - Nope, as all of these are pretty useful to the gainful operation of a firearm

    - Also nope. Maybe I'll give on the night sights but nope on the lasers.

    - These things are silly anyway. More amusing is that this is considered not redundant after eliminating automatic and semi-automatic weapons. Even with the modifications I made above, this is pretty redundant and can be accepted.

    - On the condition that carry isn't considered transport, and a weapon that is kept ready is not considered stored. Otherwise nope.

    - Eh. I'd allow it, I know a lot of others wouldn't.

    - Why? I mean sure, just means people need to buy their first gun before they need a gun. Sounds like pointless delays tbh.

    - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. No.

    - It won't help, but if you insist...

    - Random. Also if you insist.

    - Nope. 100 rounds isn't even enough to go to the range for a day.

    - Nope. Instead teach your stupid brats to not be stupid brats. Transport condition is fine as long as carry is not transport.

    - Nope. You need a fucking hobby.

    - Nope.

    - Also nope. You need to get an expensive hobby and then be told you can't make it cheaper.

    - I'm sure this will totally be done. Totally.

    - Only if it's a reasonable price. So that's a no, right?

    - I'd allow it, on the condition that the permit is shall-issue and oversight of this is performed by the NRA which can issue temporary permits if permits are not issued without valid reasons for being declined. Also on the condition that the training is paid for by the government. No fingerprints though, you get the gun details instead as listed above.

    I tried, honest I tried, but wtf was this person thinking? Did they honestly believe they were being reasonable? Hope you get a chuckle out of this at least.

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