Protecting us from felons

It is a crime for a person who has been convicted of a felony to possess or own a firearm or ammunition. Many would think that this is a wise law, as we certainly do not want people who are dangerous criminals running around with guns. The problem that I have, is that we have redefined "felony" to mean some pretty silly things. For example:

In Texas, it is a felony to own more than 4 sex toys (chapter 43). 11 of the 2,324 acts that the Texas Legislature thinks are worthy of being called felonies, making you so dangerous as to prohibit your ownership of firearms, have to do with acts that you can commit with or to an oyster. Here is the entire list of felonies for Texas.
In Utah, it is a felony to go whale hunting in a rented boat.
In Colorado, incest is a class 4 felony, punishable at the maximum by life in prison. If either participant is under 21, it becomes a class 3 felony.
In Montana It is a felony for a wife to open her husband’s mail.
In Florida, it is a felony to access WiFi without permission. There was a man who was convicted in 2005 of using a man's WiFi without permission.

These are the crimes that are used to justify removing your civil rights.